The journey

To see thee is the End and the Beginning Thou carriest me and thou goest before Thou art the Journey and the journey’s End.- Attributed to King Alfred.

I try to walk every day. As I’ve aged my legs get annoyed with my walking. It’s especially an issue on the hills. A year ago, I averaged 3 miles/day. It dropped with illness and moving to a new apartment. With the pandemic, it dropped again. During April I averaged .43/day. I’ve worked at it and each month has seen improvement—1.1, 1.7, 2.1, 2.4. My immediate target is to reach a plateau of 2.5 and stay there a bit. Then see if I can get back to 3. Who knows? Twice a week I walk with Sister Michelle, OA. That helps. We talk—catch up, ideas for writing, the Pathways of Grace program, the novitiate. I walk further on those days. 

There’s always been a two-fold journey in the walks. One is that I like walking and it’s good for my health. The other is that I often get reflective as I walk. On occasion its really obsessive thinking—monkey brain. Agitated shit! Frequently it’s pondering, exploring, opening, wondering, and life giving.

Today God interfered with my meditation

It’s not that I think God hasn’t been with me in all my journeying.  That’s creedal. But today as I came up to this wonderful tree—flash, flash, flash. All in my head of course. No burning bush, or tree.

Many years ago, I came up with a model for understanding a form of personal devotions. It is about the relationship between Contemplation – Intercession – Action. There were other models like it. This was one that helped me. Then it disappeared from my conscious use. During the pandemic it returned. I found myself contemplating the struggle for justice. I did intercession for the protesters and the police. Also, for the mayor, my city councilmember and the police chief. I wrote each of them a letter. I got invited to attend meetings of the police department’s African American Advisory Council. See how that worked?—Contemplation-Intercession-Action.       If you're interested here's today's journey.

Then it faded again 

So, today I’m walking. It was 2.3 miles. I’ll do more after I write this. I want to get a bit above 2.5 today.

I’m walking. The model isn’t in my mind. I come to this wonderful tree. Flash! It occurred to me that for two weeks I’ve been obsessing about the yard signs. But now I thought, maybe it hasn’t been obsessing. Maybe it’s been the beginning of a contemplation. Or maybe both. The model has come to mind. It is helping me understand the spiritual dynamic I’m in (or may be in).

I’d been noticing the yard signs, the posters on store windows, and the flags—Black Lives Matter, LGBTQ flags, American flags, and the one that begins with “We believe ….  A PDF   And for two weeks I’ve been aware that I agree with all the statements and I find it all irritating and I feel sad. There were a fair number of progressive political signs and flags, most houses with nothing, a few American flags.  No place along the journey was there a sign for Donald Trump. Now I think our president is both a poor president and a sad human being. But I know the reason why there were no signs in support of him in the neighborhood. It’s not because there are no Trump supporters. It’s because they know that if they put out a sign they’re inviting vandalism to their homes. They fear the violence. Which is strange because that’s what many of us fear from them. I also found myself wondering why some "I believe.." posters included "kindness" and others didn't. Yea, I know--over-thinking it.

Two days ago, I found myself wanting to create one of those “We believe” signs that looked like this --

 

I think "the divide" in the nation is soul destroying.

Contemplation

I’m still at the wonderful tree. Flash! “You’re contemplating!” This is the first step—noticing, being aware. I say to myself—"okay."

A few more steps. Flash! “How does God see all this?” There it was, the second step of contemplation.  

My guess is that there will be more to this journey.

About parish development

Those drawn to apostolic faith and practice are often helped by being able to explore the dynamics of the spiritual life by reflecting on their experience using a spiritual map. The map of Contemplation - Intercession - Action can help them bring together what appears to be something of an organic process common in all people and the need for the Christian to take responsibility for understand and engaging the mystery.

Parish churches can offer programs in which people are guided in telling about their experiences like mine and helped to conceptualize that experience using a spiritual map. 

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