The mystery of the cross
It is very difficult for us to understand the mystery of the cross. Bodies lay unburied, families are unable to mourn properly, the estimate of how much death we will face is emotionally overwhelming.
It is difficult to understand the mystery of the cross. We will flee into sentimentality. We will flee into action. We will flee into magical thinking. Perhaps we will flee into our anger and hostility, or resentment and fear, or embarrassment and silence.
It is very difficult to give ourselves to stability and obedience in the face of our fear and confusion.
They went on from there and passed through Galilee. He did not want anyone to know it; for he was teaching his disciples, saying to them, ‘The Son of Man is to be betrayed into human hands, and they will kill him, and three days after being killed, he will rise again. ’But they did not understand what he was saying and were afraid to ask him.
Then they came to Capernaum; and when he was in the house he asked them, ‘What were you arguing about on the way?’ But they were silent, for on the way they had argued with one another about who was the greatest. Mark 9:30-34 From today’s Morning Prayer reading
Depressing isn’t it? Yet exactly what we need to understand. It is the one thing that makes sense of it all. Jesus isn’t the one who makes everything work out according to our wishes. He’s not moving forward to become the ruler who will make each of us great.
We hear that God has a plan. We seem to want to assume that it’s a plan for our personal life. A plan that I might be a great surgeon. A plan that my family will always be safe and healthy. A plan that my candidate will win the election. God has a plan and it is very comforting to know that God‘s plan aligns with my own. It’s an illusion.
We sort of know it’s an illusion. Yet, we hang onto it. What do we do if we don’t hang on to it? What’s the alternative to our attempts to be in control? If we let go of that, what will we have? But our hanging onto it causes us to sink deeper into our loneliness and anger.
But if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him (Romans 6:8)
God’s plan seems to have something to do with suffering, with betrayal, with a cross. God‘s plan doesn’t seem to be about me following my passion. There seems to be something called the Passion. And I may partake of it.
Be ye steadfast!
That’s one of the spiritual stances we need to take on for these days.
I just wrote the wife of a retired deacon. He’s 89 and in the hospital with the virus. The plague comes closer to those I know and love.
I found myself writing her about Blessed Frances Perkins.
“I have this icon of Frances Perkins on my living room wall. I think of her as a protector of us seniors. For about 15 years I was a consultant for St. James, Capital Hill in DC (now SS. Monica and James). She attended there when she was Secretary of Labor. The parish likes to say that social security was created in the rectory. She loved St. Paul's 1 Corinthians 15:51-58. She got her college graduating class to make their motto "Be ye steadfast." Sounds about right for these days.”
For now, maybe I can be like the disciples. Not really understanding. Sometimes brave and sometimes fearful. Sometimes in reality and sometimes in illusion. Sometimes in solitude and sometimes lonely. Sometimes gracious and humble and sometimes angry and resentful.
But I can also be like the disciples knowing this one thing—I must stay with Jesus in this journey. It is time for me to be steadfast. Just stay with Jesus in this journey.
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Postings on the inner life and the virus
You know, and they know, that they are offering their lives
God's not indifferent to our pain
Becoming an Associate of a Religious Order
Spiritual vitality and authenticity
Faith to perceive: In your great compassion
Turn everything that happens to account
Postings on Parish Development during the Virus
Power from the center pervades the whole
To everything there is a season
Faith to perceive: Remaining inseparable